Remote onboarding doesn't fail because of technology — it fails because of silence. Without the ambient context of an office, everything has to be made explicit.
Design for the questions people won't ask
Record short Looms for the things you'd normally explain at a desk
Assign an onboarding buddy outside the reporting line
Schedule the first two weeks, don't leave them to chance
The goal is simple: by the end of week one, a remote hire should know who to ask, where things live, and that it's safe to say 'I don't get this yet.'